And THAT is when the fight started!

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, 'What's on TV?'
I said, 'Dust.' .
And then the fight started...

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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming
anniversary.
She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3
seconds.' I bought her a scale.
And then the fight started...........

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When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take
her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a gas station.
And then the fight started.............

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My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school
reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat
alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right
after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' said my wife, 'who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started................

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I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some
reason, took my order first. "I'll have the strip steak, medium
rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"
" Nah, she can order for herself."
And then the fight started.................

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A woman was standing, looking in the bedroom mirror. She
was not happy with what she saw and said to her husband,
'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay
me a compliment.'
The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'
And then the fight started..........

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I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light
for $14.95.
Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95.. I told her the
beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.
And then the fight started................

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My wife asked me if a certain dress made her back look big.
I told her not as much as the dress she wore yesterday..
And then the fight started.......................

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I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our
anniversary?" It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"
And then the fight started...................

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Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made
my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I
hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a
torrential down.
The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the
garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all
day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back
into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different
anticipation, and whispered, the weather out there is terrible.' My
loving wife of 10 years replied 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'
And then the fight started ..........